Back to the grind

Well I have returned from Bangkok after the longest break from poker I have had for a couple of years and it feels good, I'm eager to play again and should hopefully be able to play at my best for a few weeks. Thailand was excellent as I did very little whilst we were there - played pool, drank beer, sat on beach etc and it was exactly what I needed, first real holiday I've had for ages (Vegas in February was work) and I feel relaxed and am happy to be home.

It's quite weird being away from the game for so long and I found that I really didn't miss it while I was away, although now I'm home I don't doubt that I'll be racking up the hours at the tables. I'm still tired having only got back in the country 36 hours ago and it took us over a day door to door to get home. However despite my best intentions I've managed to log a fair few hours playing already - it was always going to be too much to not play when I got back!

Things have started fairly promisingly and I'm just over 1k up, have played ok nothing special but it's a nice return to action. I always find that when I have been away from the tables I worry about how I'll perform when I return, will all the same instincts be there, can I still be successful - these are ridiculous thoughts as it's a pretty obvious answer but I think it's all part of a healthy worry which I carry with me at all times - it's similar to when I'm on downswings, although I know it'll improve and I am a winning player it still gets me over analysing my game and having a need to win just to set my mind at ease.

I'm not sure if this part of my brain is a help or a hinderence. On one hand it probably stops me from taking shots at higher stakes and makes sure I'm fairly cautious and sensible with my money which as I'm looking to do this long-term has to be a good thing. However these same thoughts prvented me from moving up earlier which I definitely could have done and they are likely to prevent me from ever playing too high as I don't know if I could handle the swings even if my bankroll is adequate.

This also affects my style because despite playing poker for a living I am risk adverse and don't like gambling anything I can't afford, this is why I play a tight aggressive style which will almost certainly never change within cash games - I'm just not capable of playing LAG as it is a more swingy way to play and I'm just not prepared to do this, I do mix my play up but it is veyr selectively loose when I want to take advantage of my image at an individual table. In tournaments it is totally different and I will play a very different way to how I do in cash games.

Anyway I'm rambling cos I'm tired so bed is calling before the delights of work tomorrow morning! On a related note I made it in before 9am for what must be the first time in about 6 months - very surprising not least to me, still that's what jetlag will do to you!

Steve


August Profit $1050